On Twitter someone had tweeted about Netflix having everything except what you want to watch. It received a ton of favorites and retweets, and I kind of wish that I had said it first. It’s funny cause it’s true, it’s kind of a cinematic boneyard, where you can find the bad sequels of exceptional movies, or great actors in their worst pictures. And we got Netflix last winter, so we’ve watched all the “Mad Men“, and we recently powered through “Orange is the New Black“. The worst thing is trying to just find something, find that diamond, or at the very least a cubic zirconia in the manure. Last night, sitting on the couch, after a twelve-hour work day, both my husband and I quite keen to ignore each other completely and zone out in front of the telly, but facing that old dilemma. I just want to watch something, but not spend my allotted telly-time searching for the least shittiest thing on Netflix.
“You know what would be so good? ‘Gilmore Girls‘”.
And this is a testament to my darling husband, who was like…”Yeah, that sounds good”.
I grabbed a season from the collection in my office. Yes, I own “Gilmore Girls” on DVD, and I’m not ashamed. It’s light, funny, the writing is excellent, and hey, who wouldn’t want to live in Stars Hollow? What’s truly unfortunate is that I used to own the entire series, but somehow, around the time my ex and I split up, he lent one or two to a friend, and of course, you never get that shit back. And you know, that man put me through a lot, and I love that that’s the only thing that gets my goat after all these years. I’m totally at peace with the heartbreak and humiliation of a cancelled wedding, but if you even mention seasons one and four of “Gilmore Girls”, and I fly into a blind rage.
About ten minutes into the first episode, amidst the catchy theme song and cold leftovers, I make my Facebook status “Cold Chinese noodles & Gilmore Girls”, which of course, people were liking, because both of those things are fucking awesome. Ben falls asleep with his head on my lap midway through the episode. The first one ends…and I think, “Go on, live a little, eat something else and watch another episode”. I really should have updated the status, or tweeted “Yoghurt, pineapple and blueberries & Gilmore Girls”, but then it would have been a landslide, into “Rummaging through the cupboards & Gilmore Girls”. The third episode started, and it was creeping past my bedtime. Ben wakes up with a growl, does an army roll off the couch and announces that he is off to bed. I’m just about to update my status to “French Onion Dip, Potato Chip & Gilmore Girls”, so I can’t just drop everything to observe a decent nights sleep.
By the time the third episode is drawing to a close, I was deep into “running my finger along onion dip container edge, and plunging hand into nearly empty bag to capture potato chip crumbs & Gilmore Girls”, I know in my heart that I’ve probably gone too far.
I turn off the television, wash my hands, and wander quietly around the dark apartment, careful to not disturb my sleeping husband. When I finally crawl into bed, inappropriately full for the late hour, I feel perfectly satisfied with my slothful night on the couch, gorging on junk food with my favorite fictional friends.
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